What a year, man.

Since the wedding, and my incredible trip to Japan, and being laid off, and a record-breaking NaNoWriMo, and getting a new job, and taking on a freelance writing project, and buying a house, and moving… I’m honestly not sure I’ve taken a breath the whole year!

Now that we’re in our new place and I’m just sitting here on the bed, thinking about the future and what’s next… I’m not even sure what to do with myself. Hence, a blog post. It’s always good to be a little introspective when you’re not sure what you used to spend your time doing, am I right? What do I do with my hands?!?

So, let’s recap.

First things first. I’ve been at Mixer for 5 months now! I kind of can’t believe how fast the time has gone. I’m learning a ton, and it’s particularly fun to immerse myself in the streaming world, since my own background is so YouTube focused.

This job has afforded me the ability to travel to PAX South and East already, which has been a really great opportunity to get back in the convention scene. I’ve even run into a number of people who used to watch my videos while at these events — which was a funny experience for my coworkers to witness. One girl came up and told me that my videos meant a lot to her when she was younger (^_^) while I was talking with one of my Mixer partners — after the girl left he turned to me, eyes wide, and asked, “Who are you?”

*wink* Just your friendly Microsoft Partner Account Manager!

Beyond work, so much of my time since January has been spent on buying a house. Joe and I have known for a long time that it was something we were interested in doing, and there’s something about being married yet still living in the rental you’ve shared with so many roommates that just… doesn’t feel like you’ve fully taken that next step. So we started searching in earnest right after the holidays, and thankfully the whole process only took a couple of months! Moving is always a bit of a nightmare, but we’ve successfully landed on the other side, and we’re so thankful.

Now the fun part: decorating!

Now I’m just excited to figure out what’s next! We don’t have any MASSIVE plans coming up on the horizon, so for now… I’m excited to put my feet up, pick out a new couch, and figure out what to do with the fact that I now own a backyard. Am I now a person who can grow actual food out of the ground? Can I buy a slide ‘n slide? Do I have to learn how to mow the lawn?

In my very immediate future, I have the following fun things to look forward to (and hopefully write about!):

• This Saturday, April 27th, is Indie Bookstore Day! That means that a group of friends and I will be taking the indie bookstore challenge, which includes visiting 21 unique bookstores in a single day. I am so pumped, and there will be a blog post chronicling our adventure.
• Next Wednesday Joe and I are packing our bags and taking a long weekend to go to Iceland! This is a place I have always wanted to go, and we’ll be spending our first wedding anniversary there!
• I’ve got two camping trips, two weddings and hopefully a writing retreat planned already for the upcoming months. But I’m really keeping my fingers crossed that it will be a chill summer.

That’s all for now! I just wanted to get back in the swing of things, since part of moving for me is going to be centered around building some new/better habits. I’m really trying to set my new spaces up in ways that are positive and productive, and I’m excited to keep you all involved along the way.

Until next time!

The closer we got to the end of 2018, the more I felt that nagging desire to write some kind of “end of year blog post”. And yet every time I sat down to do it, I just… couldn’t. This past year was big. It was hugely transition in many ways, from gliding into my thirties, hitting many large positive and negative life milestones, and altogether having a sense that I’ve been doing the same things far too long and needing to take on new things.

While on the surface I’ve very much adjusted to living a life without YouTube in it, there’s still a huge part of me that is recovering from that lifestyle, and still grasping to find ways to fully fill the holes it left. It’s easy to keep doing things because you’ve done them for a long time. It’s brave to stop doing things when you realize they aren’t adding value to your life anymore. It’s scary and hard to figure out what to replace them with.

But every day is a new opportunity to reinvent yourself, and there’s no deadline. 2018 threw me some serious curveballs, but I like the direction my life has taken, and I want to keep exploring what else there is out there for me. So I’m going to spend some time looking back on this past year, and then think a little bit about my plans for 2019. As always, I thank you for joining me for any of it,

2018. We didn’t always get along, but boy were you an important year: 

• Got married to my best friend on May 4th. 
• Completed a lifelong goal of visiting Japan, on our honeymoon. 
• Learned to snorkel in Hawaii!
• Came home from my honeymoon to find out things were not going well at work. 
• Became the casualty of a company-wide reorg and lost the job I loved. 
• Got laid off for the first time ever. 
• Spent many months job searching and interviewing for so many jobs that I genuinely lost count (probably at least twenty).
• Went on many amazing trips like Disneyland, NYC, and San Francisco with friends, and a solo Chicago trip for work. 
• Took my spontaneous road trip to North Dakota while being unemployed and got to spend some quality time with relatives. 
• Finally started my book inspired by North Dakota, which became my 13th NaNoWriMo win.
• Also spent most of the year working on another book project that’s pretty close to what I’d call a “first draft”. This will be my first non-NaNoWriMo draft of a book.
• Taught myself all sorts of random new skills while being unemployed since I can’t sit still, like: sewing a quilt, embroidery, building miniature things and some minimal baking. 
• Finally got a new job at Microsoft, and started my exciting new role with the Mixer team as a Partner Account Manager in November. 
• Read 30 books, which is actually quite low for me, but a number I felt good about for wedding year. 
• Realized that with my new job and new marriage and fun hobbies and great friends I am genuinely just so happy, and cannot wait to see what this next year will bring. 

The start of the year was a whirlwind. I loved our wedding, but I hated what planning it did to me. I’m already prone to anxiety and stress, but the months leading up to the wedding were on another level. Frankly, I’m not sure I would do it all over again if I had to. But the wedding day itself… was truly magical. Seeing the joy on the faces of our friends and family really did help to make up for it, and people are still telling me it was the coolest wedding they’ve ever been to… so I suppose all the work was worth it. I’ve already blogged extensively about this, but it’s obviously the biggest pinnacle of 2018 and I am loving married life so, so much. 

I’m not so interested in new year’s resolutions, because I’m already big on habit tracking and basically set myself resolutions all the time… but here are the high level things I want to focus on next year. My values, if you will. 

1. Self-care, and setting myself up for success. By this mean I learning more about myself in terms of what food my body likes, how much water it wants, and getting in better shape, as well as being more mindful and intentional about how I spend my time. 

2. Investing time into the projects that mean a lot to me. Writing. Crafting. Cooking. Mostly writing. I’ve got a project I’m currently working on that I’d like to have in your hands by the end of the year, but we’ll see. I guess my intention for this year is to work harder on writing than ever before, and start to share it, in some form.

3. Travel! This one is a little tough because losing my job and starting over made me zero out on vacation days, but as I slowly start to accrue them again, Joe and I want to do so much traveling. We’re starting to think about larger life steps, so before we dive head-first into that stuff, we want to make sure we’re doing all the things that are so much easier with kids, a house payment, etc.

That’s it! I am in a really good head space going into 2019, I’m happy, I have a wonderful support group in terms of friends and family, my job is new and exciting and challenging, and I am deeply passionate about so many projects I’m working on. The biggest challenge, honestly, is focusing in on a couple things so I can actually do them justice. That’s always been the toughest thing for me because I always want to do EVERYTHING.

So 2019 will hopefully be the year that I do SOME things, and do them well.

Thanks for all your kind words, tweets, emails, instagram comments, etc. You have no idea how much it means to me to hear from you, especially when I’m not “creating content” regularly. I promise I am making things… it’s just on projects that take much longer, and stay much closer to the chest in the mean time.

Happy New Year! This will be a year of positive, intentional change, and I’m already loving it.

On May 29th, I came back to work after taking nearly a month off for my wedding and honeymoon. I was feeling refreshed and excited, ready to get back to my routines, ready to take on my next project. That day, however, I found out things had not been going exactly as planned at work. I found out that most of my coworkers had been living in an unnerving sort of unknown for weeks, due to hallway talk and things said in hushed voices.

On May 30th, an email came out letting us know our org was being dissolved effective immediately, and while no one was losing their job that day, there were a lot of questions that needed to be answered.

On July 9th, after a month of not knowing what was going to happen, my team was laid off – along with a whole bunch of other people we worked with.

A lot of layoffs at Microsoft are interesting because they don’t happen immediately. Though I got the news of the layoff on July 9th, my last day wasn’t set until September 7th. This is because they give you time and resources to look for a new job within the company, hoping you’ll stay. I’m thankful for that time, but what this did was create a very stressful summer, in which I felt a ticking clock constantly echoing in my ears, reminding me how many days I had left to find a new job, how many days until I would be let go for good, how I wasn’t working hard enough or applying for enough jobs or scheduling enough informational meetings.

All I wanted was to leave the stress of wedding planning behind and start the next chapter of my life on a healthy and happy foot, and yet, instead, I stepped into a new pit of stress and anxiety, worrying that if I couldn’t find another role in the allocated 60 day time period, then I must not be good enough.

Well guess what. I didn’t find a new job in the allotted 60 day period.

September 7th was my last day at Microsoft, which honestly felt pretty bad. I loved my job. I loved my team. I loved the work we were doing, and the culture our org cultivated, and I honestly loved being a Microsoftie. I loved the campus. The farmer’s market. The ham and swiss and granny smith apple sandwich I ordered way too often. I didn’t want to leave. I worked hard there for four years, I stopped making YouTube videos, and I leaned into being a ‘career person’.

And then as quickly as it began, it was over. And I’ve learned an important lesson in not counting on anything as a sure thing, not believing anything might be ‘forever’ – and it’s not a fun lesson to learn, nor is it a very optimistic way to approach life. As quickly as I have learned this lesson, I’m trying to figure out how to unlearn it.

Now it’s almost been a month, and I’m in a slightly better place with this whole situation. I finally feel like I have time again, now that the “60 day pressure” is off. I’m still working on finding a new job every day, but I’ve also given myself some room to breathe. Your job isn’t your only defining feature. It does not dictate your value or your worth. I’ve been taking a cycling class. I’ve been teaching myself new crafting skills. I’ve been writing and catching up on shows I never have time to watch and playing Pokémon Go again and cooking, and I’ve gone on a couple of little trips.

I’m going to find a job. I know I have an impressive resume and useful skills, and soon enough I’ll be back at a desk, back to my commute, back to the routine. For now, I’m trying to appreciate this time, and see it as a gift. How often do you get a few months off? How often can you decide to teach yourself embroidery just because you have some time? How often can you schedule appointments during business hours and go for a walk at noon and actually make it to bars in time for happy hour?

Don’t get me wrong – I definitely look in the mirror some days and ask myself, “why haven’t you gotten a job yet? Why did the other people in your predicament find something right away while you’re still floundering?”

But that kind of thinking isn’t helping me. All I can do is keep being brave, keep putting myself out there, and use the time as best I can. No one will be able to look back on my unemployment period and say I wasn’t living it to its fullest.

Now excuse me, I’m going to go learn how to make glow-in-the-dark slime.

LIFE UPDATE:

I keep re-inventing new ways to be busy. I’m not trying to wear that as a badge of honor, it’s just true.

This summer Joe and I ended up doing way more traveling than we had planned, which was incredible, but also made the time feel like it flew by. On top of that, I’ve been ramping into a somewhat larger role at work, and on top of that, I’m still planning that pesky wedding.

Momentum on my book has… slowed, but I’m still squeaking out whatever progress I can make in the cracks of the madness that has been this whole summer. It finally, finally rained today and I breathed this sigh of relief I hadn’t realized I’d been building up – shorter days and crummy weather means I might finally be able to hide away in coffee shops and get back into a good rhythm of writing. And of course, it also means NaNoWriMo is right around the corner…

Other things that have been going on with me…

• Joe and I did a really adult thing and bought a new dining room table. Then at the last moment we decided to put it in our living room with the board games instead of in the dining room, so we’re not quite full-fledged adults yet. We’re now eating off our older table, and have had TWO epic game nights since the new one was delivered. #noregrets
• I went to PAX and didn’t do any cosplay, which is the first con I’ve been to in probably 3 years where I didn’t cosplay at all (aside from LeakyCon, but I was a bit busy there, ha). I’m here to report that it actually felt great.
• That being said, I will be cosplaying at GeekGirlCon at the end of this month, but just one day.
• I haven’t made a video in over two months and the jury is still out on how I feel about that.

I don’t have that much to report on. I’ve been letting myself do a lot more relaxing and non-productive stuff than usual, which has meant watching TV, reading books, and saying yes to things like game nights spontaneous hang-outs.

For the longest time I really tried to cut out as many consumptive hobbies as I could, to maximize the time I spent on creative ones. Reading books was just about the only one I let slide, since reading is nearly as important for a writer as writing is. But… guys, it was exhausting. I still wish I could make all the things, but you have to give yourself a break sometimes. So that’s what I am working on.

WORDBOUND:

I haven’t shared a #wordbound prompt response in awhile, so I decided to work on one tonight.

Write a scene where a character lets something go, figuratively or literally.

No service.

The phone said the same thing every time Allison checked it, no matter how strongly she willed the WiFi signal to find something – anything. She held it up in the air, hoping it might catch some rogue stream of Internet hovering in the sky, by chance. No service. She heaved the old wooden dresser closer to the window and climbed on top, legs dangling over the side, trying to get the phone even higher up. No service. She shoved the window open with her foot and held the phone right out the window, dancing with disaster as she gave it one last effort. Even though her grip was snug, the ground two stories below was jagged with rocks.

Still no service, loser! she felt like it was mocking her. Allison yanked her arm back inside and slammed the window shut.

It had been four days since her parents had dropped she and Riley off at their Great Aunt’s house. Four days since any texts had been able to come through, since getting any pictures from her friends, since updating any of her social media. She could only imagine what might happen in four whole days at summer camp. She imagined her friends had not only met boys, but were married off and starting careers by now. They’d surely have families and houses and grandchildren by the end of the summer. She’d be hopelessly behind and never catch up and might as well not even bother going to high school at all – and to top it off, she couldn’t even complain about any of this on social media.

Allison heaved a sigh and threw herself back on her hard, patchwork bed, the useless phone still clutched in her hand.

Maybe she’d just move in with her weird aunt permanently. They could ceremoniously burn all their electronics, live off the land, swear off all boys forever. It seemed her Great Aunt had done most of these things already anyway, so Allison was sure she’d be all for it. Cabin buddies. Out in the woods. In the middle of nowhere. Forever. Someone could make a sitcom about them.

High school seemed hard anyway. Maybe she’d just skip it. Her friends probably wouldn’t even miss her, after all the fun they were likely having at camp without her.

Allison tucked the phone under her pillow and vowed to not check it again until the end of the summer.

Well, maybe the end of the day.

Okay, she definitely wouldn’t check it until at least after lunch.

–

Well, at the last minute it appears my main character decided not to let it go at all, but what can you do. Sometimes your characters are just more stubborn than you are. Hope you enjoyed this little tidbit – now to decide if it will actually make it into the book!

Life has really been a sprint lately. I wrote a blog post recently called Adjusting, about how I’m trying to chill out and not run myself ragged, and I thought it might be a good time to check in on that. Really, I’m still exhausted and super busy, but I do think I’ve made incremental changes that are worth noting and celebrating.

I’m going to run through a few bigger life categories both to catch up on what I’ve been doing, and to measure if I’ve made any sort of positive progress.

GENERAL: My biggest hurdle in terms of lowering my stress levels and breaking free from the cycle of “always being busy” definitely falls in this personal fulfillment category. This is where I suffer from guilt for not making videos, for not having an Instagram with a strictly defined visual theme, for having cosplay photos on my computer that I’ve never posted anywhere, for never being up to date on all the good new TV shows, for ever watching TV at all, for not having made enough progress on my book… the list can go on forever, if I let it. My goal this year is to not let it. These things are

These things are bonus. These things are the cherry on top. And I’m slowly learning how to be okay with that.

Lately, I’m not sure if people have noticed, but I’ve significantly slowed down making YouTube videos. So far I’ve made 6 videos in 5 months, and honestly, I feel great about it. I have a few more that I’ve filmed but still need editing, and I have some ideas for others, but YouTube has become a hobby again in a bigger way than I’ve ever let it before, and it feels really good. Goodbye, shackles!

I’m trying to keep this blog at least updated a couple times a month, with one of these larger life updates each month. I’ve embarrassingly behind in #wordbound, but that’s becoming a priority again as we phase into summer. My Instagram is still probably my favorite social account, and I try to keep it updated – including doing Instagram stories, which is new for me! That’s been kind of fun. I’m starting to get it.

I don’t have any cosplay plans until PAX (end of summer), so that’s a relief. That leaves me to happily work on my book for the next couple of months in any free time I carve out. And to just… hang out with Joe. Play games with my friends. Be a guest on a super fun Sailor Moon inspired tabletop stream. Go to the gym. The things I so often had to pass up or feel guilty about doing, before.

WEDDING: We’re still 11 months out from our wedding, so I am trying to take baby steps. Make incremental progress. I’m a planner to my very core, so I’d always rather over-prepare and then take a breath closer to the deadline than save things for the last minute, but the wedding industry is one of very mixed messages. I wish people would do studies on the pressures of being a bride, seriously. Maybe they do. It’s a very, very weird space.

Almost every day I am hit with so many opposing points of view. “You have so much time, you don’t need to be thinking about this yet. It’s too early. Your weight is going to fluctuate, you shouldn’t be ordering things yet. This is your day, do whatever you want and whatever makes sense for you. We don’t even need to meet until fall. You have so much time. Literally stop working on your wedding it’s too early.” And in the same breath, I also get, “What is your wedding theme? What are your wedding colors? Why haven’t your out of town relatives gotten save the dates yet? Where are you going for your honeymoon? You know a dress can take 8-10 months to arrive, and then you need another 2-3 months for alterations. You should really have ordered it by now. This day isn’t just about you so here’s the list of seventy-six traditions you should consider doing arbitrarily because that’s what people expect. Where’s your hotel room block?”

*falls down dead*

I am a very organized person, and I’m trying to do this whole wedding planning thing at the rate that makes sense for me. It’s very difficult not to lose my mind sometimes, but I already plan events for work and I feel like I am doing an okay job. I’m just going to keep repeating that to myself.

For inquiring minds, here is my actual progress: At 11 months out, Joe and I have selected our venue and the date. We’ve talked with a friend about designing our save the dates. We have some ideas about fun things we want to plan for during the wedding reception. We’ve mostly selected our wedding party but we haven’t asked them yet. I’ve picked out a dress, even though I had given myself another month or two to make that decision. And now that I have a decided on a dress, I am pretty sure I am set on our wedding colors.

Now that those things are decided, I think I deserve a tiny break.

Then we’ll start addressing envelopes.

TRAVELING: Work has been so, so busy lately – so I am extremely happy to have a few trips lined in the coming months. Last weekend, Joe and I went to Vegas with his family, which was a total blast.

The trip was for a combination of Joe’s mom’s birthday as well as mother’s day, and we did such a unique combination of activities for a Vegas trip. We started with the Beatles LOVE Cirque show, which I’d seen before but not since my 21st birthday. Sidenote – that was a long time ago.

The next morning we got up very early and headed out to Red Rock Canyon for a morning hike. I was very skeptical of hiking in the desert, but the weather was beautiful and there was a slight breeze, so it was actually kind of a perfect scenario. The trail was pretty bouldery, too – which I think makes hiking a lot more fun.

We also spent a good amount of time at the pool, in the casino, and eating delicious food. The gambling method of choice for both Joe and I is blackjack and craps, so we partook in just enough that we came home from the trip about even. There were of course jokes and delusions about winning the money for our wedding in Vegas, but unless you can throw a wedding for $-40, that’s a no go.

One of our biggest regrets is that we didn’t at least try this Dungeons & Dragons themed slot machine. I’m always on the lookout for the funniest slot theme, and this was the trip’s winner.

I started reading The Book Thief at the pool, and while it’s not the most lighthearted summer read, I’m glad I finally decided to give it a try. I am loving it so far. We also went to an ice bar, where they give you a parka and gloves, and essentially stick you in a very social freezer. Everything is made of ice, including your cup. I would show you pictures, but because it was Las Vegas, we weren’t allowed to take any.

Only in Las Vegas would they construct a bar made entirely out of ICE in a DESERT and then not even let you take pictures. The whole situation was very, very poetic. Las Vegas is a ridiculous place.

Upcoming trips include a camping trip for Memorial Day weekend, a jaunt to North Dakota to see relatives, and then a week-long trip to New York a bit later to meet some of Joe’s extended family. I also plan to do some hiking this summer, so I’ll hopefully do blog updates about that as well.

Overall, I’m still a little busier than I’d like to be, but I’m continuing to find the balance. I’m getting there. I don’t think there’s any real “there” to actually ever get though, so it’s just a system of constantly checking in with myself. And right now, I’m okay. 🙂

Societally, 2016 will be known as one of the very worst years of the modern age – but for me, I actually had a lot of really great highlights. It’s confusing, knowing the year was so terrible on a grand level, but still wanting to celebrate my own successes.

I’m all about the camaraderie of hating things together, and I know we have our work cut out for us for the next four years… but right now, I just want to take a deep breath and admit 2016 kind of rocked in a lot of ways, too. I saw online someone saying “don’t wish your life away”. So even though there are still 2 days left in this facepalm of a year, I want to take these final two days to be proud for having survived it, rather than rushing it to be over.

In 2016, I:

• Was hired as a Full-Time Employee at Microsoft in May, which is a career path I wasn’t expecting or even necessarily trying to take, but one that’s helped me grow in so many ways I’ve truly lost count.
• Graduated from my UW certificate program in YA Fiction Writing! This has given me so much more confidence and direction as a writer.
• Wrote my 11th NaNoWriMo novel in a castle in France, where I met incredible people and learned a great deal about myself along the way.
• Got engaged to Joe! He proposed in front of Hogwarts castle, with a ring he made himself, and I’m reminded every day how lucky I am to have found such a sweet boy who cares so much for me.
• Dyed my hair pink! After 28 years of feeling timid, I just decided to take the plunge. I’m a pink girl to the core, and now everyone knows it.
• Played a reunion concert with my band The Parselmouths! This is something I truly never thought would happen again, but somehow the planets aligned and we did it. And it felt good.
• Started cooking dinner more regularly thanks to Blue Apron! I’ve learned an insane amount about cooking since we began this endeavor, and the dedicated time with Joe doesn’t hurt, either. Plus it’s all pretty healthy food, which was a previous goal of mine.
• Ran my first 5k! Microsoft put on a charity 5k, and a bunch of my teammates and I signed up! I only actually ran about half of it, but I was proud of myself nonetheless.
• Created NINE new cosplays, including Future Twilight, Piranha Plant Girl, Lolita and Pajamas Princess Bubblegum, Taffyta Muttonfudge, Wendy from Lumberjanes, Gunner Peach, Renaissance Tinkerbell and Misty from Pokémon. This was maybe too many, in hindsight, but I had a great time doing it.
• Read _ books. I’ll fill this number in at the proper end of the year. I’m currently at 41, but there are two days left in this year. Who knows what might happen.

Last year I set some New Year’s resolutions for myself, so I thought it would be fun to revisit these and see if they worked out, how much I grew, and what to change for next year.

• Make at least one more cosplay than the previous year! (Last year I made 5, so this year I definitely hit this goal and more. In fact, because of how busy I’ve made myself, I actually want to think about this next year. Cosplay is fun, but it really has the power to eat up my life, so I want to limit what I attempt to do so I can balance with my other goals.)
• Finished editing my novel by the end of the year! (This did not happen, but I am okay with that. I decided instead of editing to do a total rewrite, and right now I am 2/3 done with that draft. I imagine I will have another solid draft of this done by spring of 2017, so that’s reasonable.)
• Read at least 52 books – one per week! (I’m racing the clock on this one, but I did make the executive decision to bump this goal down to 50. I still might not hit it, but I will get close. I really enjoyed the books I read this year, so I am satisfied here.)
• Invest in professional photo shoots for my cosplays! (I did this… twice, this year. I wasn’t overwhelmingly blown away by either set of photos, so I might just go back to casual photoshoots with my friends. I really want cosplay to just be a fun little hobby, so I think I am altogether backpedaling on my previous goals of taking it more seriously.)
• Hit year #2 at Microsoft! (Check! My anniversary is Dec 19th, so I’m officially at 2 years!)
• Find a method of exercising and eating healthy that works for me! (I got halfway there this year! Joe and I have been cooking dinner together regularly, I eat significantly less fast food than ever before, and I don’t crave as much junk food as I used to. This is a slow process, but I am proud of my progress. Exercise, on the other hand… well, that can be 2017’s problem.)

Here are my new resolutions for 2017:

• Actually finish your book to an extent where you feel okay sending it to beta readers and then, potentially, agents.
• For the love of god, start writing a completely different book. (After you finish this one, Kristina. After.)
• Plan an awesome wedding you’ll always look back on fondly, but also don’t let it make you crazy.
• Cosplay, or not, but only because you want to.
• Read at least 40 books. Be mindful of the books you choose to read. Consider #diversebooks and #ownvoices. (My reading goal number goes down every year because I am trying to be kinder to myself.)
• Continue to de-clutter and minimize possessions/wardrobe. Invest in nicer things, but less of them.
• Exercise. Please. Even just a little bit.

In 2017, I want to help others and this planet as much as possible. I want to live a more sustainable life. I want to help raise others’ voices when I can. I want to focus less on possessions and more on experiences. I want to write more, love more, worry less. I welcome 2017 with open arms.

What are your resolutions?

Hey lovely readers!

I’ve been miserable about keeping this blog updated, but I’ve had to make some personal sacrifices to prioritize working on my novel, and because of that, other writing needed to be lessened. On that note though, editing has been going well! I’m participating in Camp NaNoWriMo this month, and with a self-set goal of 25,000 words, I am doing quite well. It’s amazing how easy NaNoWriMo feels when you’re only doing half.

I’ve also been busy making costumes! This weekend is Emerald City Comic Con, and I’ve got a 3 day lineup ready (well, I still have a few finishing touches to add…)

I’m also speaking on a couple of panels this weekend, in case you’re going to the con and want to stop by! In fact, I hope you do, because I would love to have a chance to say hello and meet any of you that may happen to be going to the con as well. Here are my panels:

The Couple Who Games Together: Friday April 8th, 5pm – Sheraton Ballroom A

The Rise of Booktube in the Northwest: Saturday, April 9th, 1:45pm – T302

Sorry I’ve been so busy lately, but I can promise you silence on my end means 1 of 2 great things for those who enjoy my work. If I’m quiet, it either means that 1. I am working on my book, or 2. I am working on a cosplay. Or it could mean I am wholly exhausted and watching Netflix or reading a book, but that’s neither here nor there.

Thanks for sticking with me, and make sure you’re following me on Instagram if you want the most regular updates.

It’s been awhile since I updated this blog, and the very first day of 2016 felt like a good time to fix that. It’s a new year. A whole new year. I have no idea where the time is going but for once, that thought isn’t freaking me out. I’m actually… pretty excited.

This was me on New Year’s Eve, minutes before midnight, pondering if life would be better or worse in 2016 as a cat.

2015 was a pretty amazing year for me. It had its ups and downs of course, but I feel like I accomplished so many things, made huge life decisions that have set me on a path I am proud of, and will bring me to an even more amazing 2016.

Last year I:

• Hit 1 year working at Microsoft, in which time I not only moved to the main campus permanently, I got hired onto a new team where my very specific skills are being utilized in a way I’m really excited about.
• Started the UW certificate program for YA Novel Writing, which encompasses night classes I love every minute of and really has inspired me to work on editing my novel.
• Made the concrete decision to edit my 2014 novel to a point where I feel confident submitting it to agents in hopes of publishing.
• Completed my 10th NaNoWriMo in a row, a goal I’ve been working on for the entire decade comprising my adult life.
• Celebrated 3.5 years with Joe, the most incredible human being I know and a big reason I am so happy and self-confident these days.
• Chopped all my hair off and dyed it green! I feel more like myself than I have in a long time, and I can’t see myself growing it out for awhile.
• Bought a brand new car! This was my first big adult purchase, my first loan beyond student loans, and I’m totally in love with Chip, my root beer colored Mini Cooper.
• Went to BEA entirely be myself (but as a result got to spend nearly a whole week with the wonderful SuperSpaceChick) and had the most amazing time being submersed in the book industry.
• Completed FIVE cosplays over the course of the year, including Rapunzel, Blake from RWBY, Wendy from Gravity Falls, Joy from Inside Out and KiKi from the Little Twin Stars.
• Didn’t have my vocal nodes impact my life in any way that kept me from doing things nearly the entire year. I’m keeping it under control, finally!
• Read 78 books, something that means more to me than I can even fully explain – but other book lovers get it. Books really filled my soul this year. I’m so happy.

My twenties haven’t always been easy. I know that even at the hardest of times I’m still an extremely fortunate person: with amazing friends, a loving family, a house to live in right in a beautiful part of Seattle, a job, good health – these are things I try not to take for granted even a single day of my life. But my view of my own self worth, my personal happiness, my ability to work on the things that matter to me, the removal of toxic people from my life — these are the things that really came into focus for me in 2015. This has been my brightest year yet, and I can’t wait for things to just keep getting better.

In 2016 I plan to:

• Make at least one more cosplay than the previous year!
• Finished editing my novel by the end of the year!
• Read at least 52 books (one per week!)
• Invest in professional photo shoots for my cosplays
• Hit year #2 at Microsoft!
• Find a method of exercising and eating healthy that works for me!

2015 was all about working on my mind and spirit. This year I want to be about my body, as well. I’m hoping to make exercise and healthy food a part of my life in a way I’ve never managed to do before. I hope to take more time to relax, to learn more about health in general, and to look and feel great in my cosplays.

As always, it means so much to me that there are people out there who appreciate what I do, whether that’s watching my videos, commenting on my cosplay photos, reading my blog or just chatting with me on Twitter. I feel so lucky that people care about what I’m doing. I love that I continue to have YouTube as an outlet to keep people updated on my life, and here’s to 2016 involving many, many more projects and memories.

I’ve got a few cool things I want to fill you guys in on, stuff I’m working on and whatnot. I’ll just throw it all together in a little update blog because, why not?

1. I decided (about a month ago) to put my head down and actually start editing one of my NaNoWriMo novels. I am making absolutely no promises about what this means, except that it’s a thing I am doing. I just thought it was worth mentioning that I liked my 2014 NaNo novel enough to focus some serious energy on sorting through the mess that is my first draft, cleaning it up, and potentially giving it to some friends to read to help me turn it into… something.

Mostly I wanted to let you guys know because unlike the thrill of NaNo and writing that first draft, it turns out that editing is an extremely solitary activity with no way of sharing anything until it’s done. So, if I’m quieter online for awhile, that’s probably why. If you were following me during NaNoWriMo you already know this, but the novel is called “Delaney Unlaced”.

2. My Patreon page is still a thing, and I try to take an active effort to keep it new and exciting as often as I can. Especially now that I have a 40-hour-a-week day job, it’s harder than ever to prioritize what I use my extra time for. I’ll never stop making YouTube videos, but after that – Patreon really helps me decide where to dedicate those precious few remaining hours. Want to be able to influence the types of things I’m creating? What new projects I work toward? Here are a few of the goals I’m considering, that you can help make possible by becoming a patron!

I’m always curious to know which of these ideas/projects people are the most excited about (and there are of course other ones listed on the site; these are just the bigger ones). If these sound interesting to you at all, or are things you’d like to see me do, consider checking out my Patreon! I would never ask for something for nothing, so in addition to these overall goals, there are other perks available for becoming a patron (including being part of the Secret Facebook Group, getting your link in the sidebar of this website, joining my monthly Google Hangout, etc).

Again, don’t feel any pressure to use Patreon. I’ll never make it a requirement for watching my content and I won’t think less of you if you don’t care to use it. But I do have to make sure that potential new readers/viewers at least know it exists at all!

3. Costumes, costumes, costumes. I’ve been hard at work getting my cosplays together for Emerald City Comic Con, and it’s been a crazy amount of work – especially Rapunzel! Curse you, Rapunzel!! There will be pictures to come, of course. I seriously can’t believe how much work it’s been. If I seem a little crazy over the next few weeks, it’ll be because of this costume. Dear god. So much hair. There’s so much hair!!

That’s about it for me right now. Be sure you’re following me on Twitter and Instagram for more frequent updates about costumes, what I’m reading and general news. It’s been really difficult not having the same amount of time to interact with you guys, which is why I am so adamant about keeping this blog current.

I don’t want it to feel like I’ve gone away. I’m right here! I’m still making things! Love me!

Until next time,

Kristina xoxo

Hello, lovely blog readers!

As you can see by the title of this blog post… I’ve got some rather big news to share. Life alteringly big news, in fact — and something I’ve kept quiet for the last two months.

I got a job at Microsoft.

This is pretty intense news, so here is a picture of some kittens at a birthday party.

To be honest it feels a little cliched, having grown up in Seattle. If you were raised here, you know what I’m talking about. If your parents didn’t work at Microsoft they worked at Boeing. While I’d mulled over the idea of getting some sort of day job over the last year or so, I always imagined some hip new media company. Not… Microsoft. Not the most obvious place to work in the Northwest.

But here I am. And to be honest, it is a pretty hip job. I was hired as a Community Manager, which means my responsibilities include a whole spectrum of various types of community engagement for a laundry list of games owned by Microsoft Studios.

But Kristina!? you’re probably asking. Why did you take this job? I thought you were a professional YouTuber! I thought you made oodles of money talking to your camera!

First of all, I am flattered if you think that. Alas, while I enjoyed my freelance time immensely, it was really starting to weigh on me. If anyone ever tells you that turning your hobby into your job is the ~American Dream~, then you should just tell them to talk to the hand. Because (let me drop a wisdom bomb on you for a second here) if there’s one thing I have learned in my twenty-seven years of life, it’s this: we have hobbies for a very specific reason. We have hobbies because we are creative animals, and we enjoy making things, doing things, being part of things. Sometimes we even enjoy making things just for the sake of creation, but when you add financial pressure to that, you can literally feel your enjoyment start to deflate.

I didn’t want to hide sponsorships in my videos anymore. I didn’t want to make videos for other companies’ channels anymore. I didn’t want to wake up every day knowing I had to film videos, or had to write blog posts, or I might not pay rent. And I also didn’t appreciate the ever-present self awareness of “what am I actually doing with my life” looming overhead.

I am acutely aware, however, of how special a thing I’ve created online. And how lucky I am that so many of you care enough about what I’m doing to have stuck around this long. For a long time, considering getting a different job felt like giving up. Throwing in the towel. It felt like I was admitting I hadn’t “made it”.

But then I start re-evaluating my goals. Made what, exactly? I starting thinking about what I was actually doing, and what I wanted to be doing. I love making videos. I love blogging. I love my Patrons, and my book club, and I love the amazing community of intelligent, caring people who engage with the things that I do.

Why would any of that need to change, just because I wanted to get a day job?

It was at that moment that I realized it wouldn’t change. I could still make videos. I could still read books. I could still blog, and tweet, and interact with people online exactly like I always have. This moment of clarity changed everything and I began applying for jobs. The Microsoft opportunity came at exactly the right time and while I’ve been extremely stressed out as I struggle to adjust to a vastly different lifestyle… not much has actually changed, at least online.

In fact, that only thing that’s been really tough has been not telling you guys about what I’m doing, which is precisely why I am writing this blog post. So… I work at Microsoft now, 40 hours a week. This probably explains why I might have seemed a little distant lately. It was tough to figure out what to talk about without spilling the beans, but I wanted to give myself time to adjust on my own before I told the whole Internet.

Oh, it’s also been tough to keep up with my email. I did not realize how much email I got until I wasn’t able to check it regularly. How cow. But that’s another issue entirely.

So just to sort of let you know what to expect from me now, my online presence mostly won’t change. You can still count on 2 new videos a week. The Restricted Section book club is still going strong. I’ve got three cosplays planned for Emerald City Comic Con. And this blog will always be here.

I’m just going to have a bit less free time, and I might complain about traffic a lot more, since my commute is right in the heart of rush hour and includes a toll bridge. But audiobooks are a new obsession of mine, so there’s always a silver lining.

Whew. I don’t know why I am so nervous to be announcing this. I guess it makes sense, because it’s the biggest change that’s happened in my life in a long time. It’s been sort of a tough adjustment, and I miss having all the time in the world to create things for you guys.

But I think this is going to be a very good thing for me.